Back From the Beach

I have to say my first night away from E was great! I was scared how I would do with not kissing her goodnight or waking up to hearing her call my name. But I didn't think about it once. It was only for 1 night, so I didn't really get the chance to miss her. And I never could have done this last year... but after 2.7 years of waking up to her every day- it was needed!

I haven't posted about this yet, but I am a single mom. That has made parenting quite hard and challenging. But I have the love and support from my wonderful mother who has allowed us to move in with her so I could be a stay at home parent. With the cost of daycare and what I was bringing in before E, it just didn't make much sense. And the daycares I did look at, I left crying at the thought of leaving her there. But, being a single mom, I don't get many nights or days to myself. I'm at a point in my life where I need to figure out what's next. For 2.7 years my life has been about my child and now that she's becoming independent, it's time to find me again.

I'm sure any parent- single or married feels this way too. But it's been really hard only having 3 hours to myself each day without having to worry about what she's doing. And if you've been through the terrible 2's, you know exactly what I'm talking about. So getting away to the beach was exactly what I needed to refresh and feel like an adult again. I didn't figure anything out while I was there, but the recharge button was hit and I'm happy that we both made it through this big step. When I did walk through the door Ella looked and me and screamed, "it's my best friend!" So I was happy to be at home with my baby girl.